The Motley Fool's Money After 40 by David Gardner

Author:David Gardner
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Published: 2004-01-15T00:00:00+00:00

Get on the Same Page—Early

You should begin doing the first task early—ideally, while your parents are still thriving and active. If you put this off, you may end up with a parent suddenly incapable of telling you what you want or need to know.

Have some frank discussions.

Gather important information and learn their wishes—ideally, with your siblings present as well. Here’s what you should tackle:

• Have your parents show you where they keep all their important documents. Find out where their safe-deposit box is and the key. If they have a stash of expensive jewelry or gold coins, find out where it is. If they have a safe in the basement, ask how to open it. Have them list all their important accounts and account numbers. See if they’ll tell you how much money they have invested here and there. One day you will need to know about every bank account, every brokerage account, every insurance policy, the mortgage or deed to any house, their wills and law firm that keeps the wills, burial arrangements and cemetery plots, etc. Don’t let all this information stay only in one place, where a fire or other disaster might wipe it out. Keep a list of information in a safe backup place. If this sounds like a hassle, it is. But it will be much more of a hassle later if you don’t prepare and attend to it now. If your parents are not cooperative, perhaps explain how this will make things easier on you later (emphasize much later, if that’s helpful).

• Come to an understanding of their final wishes, such as funeral arrangements. Jot down any preferences they have, perhaps regarding the kind of service they want, songs to be sung, the kind of casket, etc. Discuss whether they want to be organ donors and what their preferences are regarding life support if they end up in bad shape in a hospital. This is depressing stuff for anyone to think about, and it might make your parents even glummer. So you might make it more of a family affair by sharing your own wishes and preferences. This is sensible; terrible though it may be, you could conceivably die first, and your loved ones will want to know what your wishes were. Although the main purpose of this exercise is respect and the comfort that comes from being prepared rather than frantic, it’s also likely that it will save some money as well. If you never discuss your father’s funeral wishes with him, you might end up buying him a top-of-the-line casket, because anything less would seem disrespectful. But via a talk, your dad might explain that a simple inexpensive casket is fine by him. Maybe you’ll learn that your mother would rather be cremated than buried. That can save money, too. When you’re done with this discussion, do the Motley Fool thing and treat one another to ice-cream sundaes all ’round!

• Have them look into long-term care insurance if they haven’t already done so.

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